Forgive

I have many times experienced a situation, reaction, or just an approach where I wasn't honestly sure whether the author is kidding me or not. I spent years training the proper reactions as any harmful or sarcastic reaction doesn't get you closer to any solution.

I believe the most important - especially in situations where time is highly critical - is to solve the crisis and later ensure it will not happen again. Therefore my first reaction must always be forgiving and concentrating on the issue.

I'm afraid the ability to forgive is not stressed enough throughout the world. How can you go and find the solution when you are full of negative emotions from what you have just seen or experienced? This costs energy and concentration, and you are wasting your precious time to figure out the next steps.

Also, there's one advantage in concentrating on the particular solution rather than on a behavior - you have the time to calm down.

To forgive is not to forget - you shall bring this up in the next opportunity. Either right after the meeting, during a 1-1 or over a cup of coffee. Understand what the key motivation for the behavior was. How the issue occurred? Clearly state why it is unacceptable. Agree on the next steps, prepare a plan, or - if this is a bambolleon time the problem occurred - consider changing the position, responsibilities, or going further without the person.

And don't forget to forgive your supervisor whenever he makes a mistake.